hang in there…

7 Dec

Its funny when you tell someone you have cancer they immediately tell you about someone they know or heard of that beat it and is now totally fine…like it was the common cold.   I certainly hope to be in that number, but it gets tiring — I almost want to shake people and scream “no, this is different”.  No one wants to come face to face with mortality, so I don’t burst their bubble.  Also, everyone seems keen on finding me something to do or keeping me preoccupied…which is funny because I still have the same life I did before my diagnosis with all its problems, errands, dreams, etc.  My main concern right now is to get the piece of shit tumor out of my head that is actively trying to kill me.  Its been a week since my PET scan with no news (despite my calling for the results).  I should know very soon too if I have been medically accepted by MD Anderson…which will be the best Christmas gift ever especially as I saw my PET scan orders that day of the scan that read routine on status.   As best I can tell nothing nothing is routine about this cancer and the irony of everything is how fast you feel time passing since your diagnosis yet all you do is wait wait wait for results and treatment.

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